Sometimes, I have no choice but to come face to face with my fears. Unfortunately, this happened twice last night. The first time while sitting on the floor in my living room and the second while looking at the calendar in my bedroom.
From the depths of somewhere in my house, an array of spiders always find their way out of spaces and around corners, crawling stealthily and speedily towards me. 95% of the time I am overcome with involuntary fright and an occasional scream in my attempts to relocate or squish.
The horror comes in one of three levels of seriousness:
1: Floor crawling > 2: Wall scaling > 3: Ceiling hanging
Level 1: For squishing, anything can be used! Which makes level 1 crawlers the least scary.
Level 2: While many things can be used for squishing, you must now take into account the color of the wall and whether or not you want the mark of the spider on the wall or a dent in the wall from whacking it too harshly.
Level 3: These spiders are the most horrific because they are most difficult to reach and they have the power of dropping themselves onto you or past you, therefore making an escape.
I'm sad to say that last night I had a Level 1 spider and a Level 2 spider. One was successfully squished. The other managed to jump past me and is now somewhere in my bedroom.
I like this one a lot because I do it too. Yesterday, I found two ants in my shower. MY SHOWER. The place where I like to GET CLEAN. Not have to worry about creepy crawlers gettin' at me. Then, I got out of the shower and watched one drown. It was awful. I felt awful. I could save him from his fate. So I did. I squished him with toilet paper and flushed him.
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